*insert title*

I feel like I'm at a bit of a cross roads medically speaking... I'm healthier than I have been in well over two years, that's a GOOD thing, so why am I uneasy about it? One thing could be that I have been so ill for so long it's as if I don't know how to NOT be sick. Make sense? Another thing could be that I don't "feel" healthy which I know probably sounds really crazy but what I mean is there is always something hurting or throbbing, always a muscle cramp or some noise coming from Stella my ostomy. Yes I don't have blood draws and anti-biotic to worry about taking and I don't have to run the bathroom every 10-15 minutes anymore and I am SO glad... I just keep waiting for the next thing to happen, because in the past it has, and I get on edge and have to remind myself that for now everything is good. "Don't stress over what MIGHT happen next week" is what I keep telling myself, at the same time I reply to myself (I know crazy) "But I need to be ready so I can handle the next crisis"... It's sad I know. *sigh*

I'm not sure where this post was going, I had something else in mind but.... well maybe later :)
In the meantime check out these lyrics of a song I've been listening to a lot lately!


"In Time" - Kris Allen

Seems like forever since I felt alive
My whole world was shaken in the blink of an eye
And everybody's got a word
That's gonna take away the hurt
And make everything alright
But give me just a little while
Cause in time

In time I'll run
And in time I'll heal
And in time these wounds will show me what's real
And in time I'll learn
And in time I'll trust
And in time we'll love what's been broken in us
In time

Give yourself some distance, and what do you find
That it's in the shadow places you first see the light
And I know there's a reason
But I just can't see it
At least not tonight
But give me just a little while
Cause in time

In time I'll run
And in time I'll heal
And in time these wounds will show me what's real
And in time I'll learn
And in time I'll trust
And in time we'll love what's been broken in us
In time

Wait, wait, for it now
Wait, wait, for it now
It's coming, it's coming
Wait, wait, for it now
Oh, won't you wait, wait, for it now

In time I'll run
And in time I'll heal
And in time these wounds will show me what's real
And in time I'll learn
And in time I'll trust
And in time we'll love what's been broken in us
In time
In time